Im praying for you and your family, Andy. I have been through a time like this myself. Its very hard deal with on your own. Just lean on God, He will give you comfort and peace that you need. He will also give you hope for a brighter day. Heres 2 verses I that always help me.
"Your eyes saw my unformed substance, and in Your Book all the days of my life were written before ever they took shape, when as yet there was none of them." Psalm 139:16

"For I know the thoughts and plans I have for you, says the Lord, thoughts and plans for welfare and peace and not for evil, to give you hope in your final outcome." Jeremiah 29:11

Hope this helps you Andy,
Chris