my goodness this is funny
#394126
03/08/10 02:49 AM
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Joined: Jul 2009
Posts: 2,320
Pvt.snoballz
OP
Junk Yard Dog
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OP
Junk Yard Dog
Joined: Jul 2009
Posts: 2,320 |
A lawyer went duck hunting for the first time in Texas. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of the fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator responded, "I shot a duck, it fell into this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it." The old farmer replied, "This is my property and you are not coming over here." The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in the U.S. and if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own." The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we do things in Texas. We settle small disagreements like this with the Texas Three-Kick Rule." The lawyer asked, "What is the Texas Three-Kick Rule?" The Farmer replied, "Well, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times, and so on, back and forth, until someone gives up." The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom. The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the city feller. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees. His second kick nearly wiped the man's nose off his face. The barrister was flat on his belly when the farmer's third kick to a kidney nearly caused him to give up. The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet and said, "Okay, you old coot! Now, it's my turn!" The old farmer smiled and said, "No, I give up. You can have the duck."
that made me laugh....SO HARD <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/loopy.gif" alt="" />
JYD 110
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Re: my goodness this is funny
[Re: Pvt.snoballz]
#394127
03/08/10 03:13 AM
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Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 3,860
myketheknife
Junk Yard Dog
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Junk Yard Dog
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 3,860 |
SYKCO JYD#112 It's better to have it & not need it, than to need it & not have it.
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Re: my goodness this is funny
[Re: Pvt.snoballz]
#394128
03/08/10 03:14 AM
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Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 3,111
tonester
Junk Yard Dog
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Junk Yard Dog
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 3,111 |
JYD #114
"Good things come to those who wait for everything to pass." - OTR
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Re: my goodness this is funny
[Re: kibbleznbitz]
#394130
03/08/10 06:28 AM
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 46,720
Private Klink
Junk Yard Dog
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Junk Yard Dog
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 46,720 |
I love it!!! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/thumbup.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/thumbup.gif" alt="" />
Junk Yard Dog #1 Moderator/Leader of the Pack Good night Mrs. B, wherever you are! Long Live the Brotherhood of the Yard!
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Re: my goodness this is funny
[Re: Private Klink]
#394131
03/08/10 07:56 AM
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Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 3,111
tonester
Junk Yard Dog
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Junk Yard Dog
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 3,111 |
i think if i was the lawyer and i came across an old texan farmer that told me about the texas three kick rule i would just turn around and head the other way!
JYD #114
"Good things come to those who wait for everything to pass." - OTR
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Re: my goodness this is funny
[Re: tonester]
#394132
03/09/10 01:41 PM
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Joined: Apr 2009
Posts: 156
gofastalot
Mutt
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Mutt
Joined: Apr 2009
Posts: 156 |
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Re: my goodness this is funny
[Re: tonester]
#394133
03/09/10 02:14 PM
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Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 2,711
Joe Fowler
Junk Yard Dog
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Junk Yard Dog
Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 2,711 |
i think if i was the lawyer and i came across an old texan farmer that told me about the texas three kick rule i would just turn around and head the other way! Yeah, that. Unfortunately not every "smart" person is very "wise". <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
JYD #90
A man carries a knife everyday... even to church.
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Re: my goodness this is funny
[Re: Pvt.snoballz]
#394134
03/10/10 01:31 AM
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 6,743
Dumpster Dan
Junk Yard Dog
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Junk Yard Dog
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 6,743 |
A lawyer went duck hunting for the first time in Texas. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of the fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator responded, "I shot a duck, it fell into this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it." The old farmer replied, "This is my property and you are not coming over here." The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in the U.S. and if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own." The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we do things in Texas. We settle small disagreements like this with the Texas Three-Kick Rule." The lawyer asked, "What is the Texas Three-Kick Rule?" The Farmer replied, "Well, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times, and so on, back and forth, until someone gives up." The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom. The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the city feller. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees. His second kick nearly wiped the man's nose off his face. The barrister was flat on his belly when the farmer's third kick to a kidney nearly caused him to give up. The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet and said, "Okay, you old coot! Now, it's my turn!" The old farmer smiled and said, "No, I give up. You can have the duck."
that made me laugh....SO HARD <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/loopy.gif" alt="" /> I love it LOL Thanks for sharing Dan
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