The Sig is fantastic for the price. The Ruger is a classic but the CZ75 would be my first choice unless I got a used Ruger at a good price. A .22 is a better self defence gun than most people think. It also will not endanger your family by going through walls.
Isn't there a psalm in the bible about "if you don't have a sword ,sell you cloak and buy one"? That might help with the missus?