GD, that's because I edited out details.

In a nutshell, my experience has it's foundation in growing up in a survivalist household. When I say "survivalist" I'm referring to the 1980's Red Dawn / First Blood variety....not the Internet "preppers" of today. Suffice to say, I learned a lot but it wasn't a healthy environment.

ETA: this is why I am not and will never be a prepper. It's like a preacher's son who grows up and can't stand church because of what he saw (the ugly side) growing up.