I have 2 Marlin 45-70s. I shoot Leverevoltions in the guide gun and stout cowboy loads in the 28" (or 26"--I forget). The Leverevolutions are less painful, but have about the same kick as a 12 gauge shooting slugs. First time I took it out this year, it rocked me backward as I shot a deer and I'm a reasonably heavy guy. That said, it's actually a reasonably pleasant gun and round to shoot (once you remember what to expect).

A 44 lever gun is certainly less painful, but depending on your goals, a nice 30-30 might be the best options. That round has accounted for more deer in the Northeast than any other round--probably more than all other rounds combined. Gives you a nice easy 100 yard relatively flat shooting gun and can be shot well beyond that too. It's significantly less recoil than a 45-70 and will likely have less of a chance of a first time shooter developing a flinch. Might actually start off with a 22 at the range just to get used to shooting without flinching. Nothing worse than developing bad habits early on.

I started my kids on 22s. The oldest went on to a 243 with a 100 grain bullet and is now shooting my 25-06 with 120 grain bullets. He's 13 and about a buck 10. The 30-30 with a 150 grain bullet should be roughly the same as the 25-06 (maybe a little less felt recoil for the 30-30) and, if you are woods hunting, would likely provide all the distance you need.

My two bits